Phrase by 'Fred Allen'

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If I could get my membership fee back, I'd resign from the human race.

Author: Fred Allen - American Comedian
  Back , Race , Human , Get


The first time I sang in the church choir; two hundred people changed their religion.

Author: Fred Allen - American Comedian
  People , Time , Funny , Religion


Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners.

Author: Fred Allen - American Comedian
  Like , Act , Treat , Employees


I don't want to own anything that won't fit into my coffin.

Author: Fred Allen - American Comedian
  Want , Own , Anything , Coffin


Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs.

Author: Fred Allen - American Comedian
  Stars , God , Fear , Church


I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back.

Author: Fred Allen - American Comedian
  Day , Back , College , Law


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