Phrase by 'Fred Allen'
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An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission.
Author: Fred Allen - American ComedianBusiness , Advertising , Confusion , Agency
It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually supportive alliances through which partners recognize their dependence on each other for the achievement of shared and private goals.
Author: Fred Allen - American ComedianLove , Goals , World , Achievement
California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.
Author: Fred Allen - American ComedianYou , Live , Place , Funny
Television is a device that permits people who haven't anything to do to watch people who can't do anything.
Author: Fred Allen - American ComedianPeople , Who , Anything , Television
A gentleman is any man who wouldn't hit a woman with his hat on.
Author: Fred Allen - American ComedianMan , Woman , Hat , Gentleman
You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a fruit fly and still have room enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart.
Author: Fred Allen - American ComedianYou , Heart , Fruit , Fly
An income tax form is like a laundry list - either way you lose your shirt.
Author: Fred Allen - American ComedianYou , Way , Lose , Shirt
Committee - a group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group decide that nothing can be done.
Author: Fred Allen - American ComedianNothing , Men , Done , Group
Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange men whose only objective is to make a hole in one with you.
Author: Fred Allen - American ComedianLife , You , Men , Strange
I always have trouble remembering three things: faces, names, and - I can't remember what the third thing is.
Author: Fred Allen - American ComedianAlways , Three , Remember , Trouble