Phrase by 'Patton Oswalt'

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Lot of ugly funny dudes end up with some pretty gorgeous women. Women are much deeper than us in choosing a mate - they see in the long term.

Author: Patton Oswalt - American Comedian
  Long , Women , Funny , Ugly


Every audience is different, even within the same venue. You have to just make every audience your audience; you can't pre-judge an audience based on the size of the room or the type of room.

Author: Patton Oswalt - American Comedian
  You , Your , Just , Room


The Kentucky Fried Chicken corporation made a bobble head of me and sent it to my management. No card, nothing.

Author: Patton Oswalt - American Comedian
  Me , Nothing , Management , Chicken


If you hit a midget on the head with a stick, he turns into 40 gold coins.

Author: Patton Oswalt - American Comedian
  You , He , Gold , Head


George Bush is not stupid. He's evil. OK? There's a huge difference between stupid and evil.

Author: Patton Oswalt - American Comedian
  He , Stupid , Evil , Difference


I have to drink this much to be as unfunny as you.

Author: Patton Oswalt - American Comedian
  You , Drink , Much


90% of every art form is garbage - dance and stand-up, painting and music. Focus on the 10% that's good, suck it up, and drive on.

Author: Patton Oswalt - American Comedian
  Music , Good , Art , Dance


I think I realized it was an art form at the beginning, but it took me a really long time before I was able to view what I was performing myself as an art form.

Author: Patton Oswalt - American Comedian
  Me , Myself , Time , Art


I think right now is the best time for stand-up, ever. I sincerely do.

Author: Patton Oswalt - American Comedian
  Time , Think , Best , Right


I mean, the death in the late eighties and early nineties really shook out a lot of hacks. The pond just sort of dried up for a lot of really bad comedians.

Author: Patton Oswalt - American Comedian
  Bad , Death , Late , Mean


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