Phrase by 'Michelle Wolf'
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I always almost miss my flight. My routine is to constantly, no matter how bad or good the traffic is, to almost miss my flight.
Author: Michelle Wolf - American ComedianBad , Good , Matter , Traffic
When I'm on the road, I eat like I'm on the third day of a hiking trip all the time. I'm eating beef jerky and trail mix constantly.
Author: Michelle Wolf - American ComedianTime , Day , Eating , Road
I think I'm a good joke writer. I'm also very scared that the last joke I wrote is the last joke I'll ever write.
Author: Michelle Wolf - American ComedianThink , Good , Last , Joke
People can be successful for a short period of time, but only a handful of people are successful for decades.
Author: Michelle Wolf - American ComedianSuccessful , People , Time , Short
Writing and telling jokes is my favorite thing to do, and I want to be able to do that forever.
Author: Michelle Wolf - American ComedianWant , Writing , Forever , Jokes
Some comedy has turned into, 'Donald Trump's bad, isn't he?' That's a true statement. But where is your joke?
Author: Michelle Wolf - American ComedianBad , True , Comedy , Joke
Before comedy, I worked at a tech company, and before that, I worked on Wall Street. And, honestly, I've never really been sexually harassed.
Author: Michelle Wolf - American ComedianNever , Comedy , Company , Street
A lot of people want Trump to be impeached. I do not. Because just when you think Trump is awful, you remember Mike Pence. Mike Pence is what happens when Anderson Cooper isn't gay.
Author: Michelle Wolf - American ComedianYou , People , Remember , Gay
Watching Rachel Maddow is like going to Target. You went in for milk, but you left with shampoo, candles, and the entire history of the Byzantine Empire. 'I didn't need this.'
Author: Michelle Wolf - American ComedianYou , Need , Like , History
Republicans are easy to make fun of.
Author: Michelle Wolf - American ComedianEasy , Make , Fun , Republicans