Phrase by 'Michael Ian Black'

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Let me tell you, the life of a C list celebrity is pretty sweet. If I want to go to an Applebee's, all I have to do is, literally, walk in the door. They seat me as soon as the other people ahead of me are seated.

Author: Michael Ian Black - American Comedian
  Life , You , Me , Walk


Corporations do a lot of things well, but not run nations, for obvious reasons.

Author: Michael Ian Black - American Comedian
  Well , Run , Things , Corporations


I honestly believe you can never tell if a relationship is going to last. In my own marriage, which is going on 14 years, I don't think of it as 'I'm going to be with this person forever.' Instead, I think of more like, 'I'll probably be with this person for the next six weeks. Then I'll re-evaluate.'

Author: Michael Ian Black - American Comedian
  You , Believe , Marriage , Relationship


Separation is the worst. There's no good way to deal with it, other than to get on the phone and do Skype and try to visit.

Author: Michael Ian Black - American Comedian
  Good , Way , Try , Phone


Best strategy for a first date is to ask her questions. Just keeping asking her questions about herself. Her life, her job, her friends, her taste in movies and music and everything. People mostly just want to talk about themselves, so let her do that.

Author: Michael Ian Black - American Comedian
  Life , Music , People , Best


Most of the time, you don't win anything on reality shows. You're booted off, or maybe you win $50,000, or $100,000, which isn't really life-changing. I don't know that it's worth it.

Author: Michael Ian Black - American Comedian
  You , Time , Reality , Win


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