Phrase by 'Henny Youngman'
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If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.
Author: Henny Youngman - American ComedianSome people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.
Author: Henny Youngman - American ComedianMusic , People , Time , Marriage
If at first you don't succeed... so much for skydiving.
Author: Henny Youngman - American ComedianYou , First , Funny , Succeed
I know a man who doesn't pay to have his trash taken out. How does he get rid of his trash? He gift wraps it, and puts in into an unlocked car.
Author: Henny Youngman - American ComedianKnow , Gift , Man , Car
Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport.
Author: Henny Youngman - American ComedianBack , Travel , Airport , Mother-In-Law
While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
Author: Henny Youngman - American ComedianGolf , Two , Good , Today
This is an elegant hotel! Room service has an unlisted number.
Author: Henny Youngman - American ComedianService , Hotel , Room , Hotel Room
I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
Author: Henny Youngman - American ComedianBecome , Holidays , Christmas , Atheist
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.
Author: Henny Youngman - American ComedianMe , Medical , Doctor , Quit
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