Phrase by 'George Burns'

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Who makes us laugh is a comedian. Who makes us think and then laugh is a humorist.

Author: George Burns - American Comedian
  Humor , Laugh


It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.

Author: George Burns - American Comedian
  Me , Remember , Drink , Drunk


Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

Author: George Burns - American Comedian


The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

Author: George Burns - American Comedian
  Good , Beginning , Together , Ending


If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn't ask me, I'd still have to say it

Author: George Burns - American Comedian
  You , Me , Important , Stress


You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.

Author: George Burns - American Comedian


First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.

Author: George Burns - American Comedian
  You , Your , Forget , Down


I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.

Author: George Burns - American Comedian
  Love , You , Success , Failure


When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

Author: George Burns - American Comedian
  Sick , Dead , Sea , Funny


Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.

Author: George Burns - American Comedian
  Age , Still , Ridiculous , Retirement


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