Phrase by 'Bill Burr'
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My favorite kind of humor is basically, if it was happening to you, it wouldn't be funny, but to observe it, it's hilarious.
Author: Bill Burr - American ComedianHumor , You , Funny , Observe
I gotta be honest with you. I'm kind of jealous of the way my dad gets to talk to my mom sometimes. Where are all those old-school women you can just take your day out on? When did they stop making those angels?
Author: Bill Burr - American ComedianYou , Day , Women , Jealous
Did you ever spell a word so bad that your spell check has absolutely no clue what you're trying to spell? What do you end up getting, you end up getting, like, a question mark. You got a million dollars of technology just looking back at you like, 'You got me, buddy. Which is pretty amazing because I have all the words.'
Author: Bill Burr - American ComedianYou , Me , Technology , Looking Back
You know, it wasn't even that I'm a funny guy, I just loved stand-up comedy and I wanted to do it. It was one of the few things in my life that I knew I was going to be able to do, and I also felt as though I'd be able to do it the way I wanted to do it.
Author: Bill Burr - American ComedianLife , You , My Life , Funny
The word 'ranting' is kind of overused now. Literally, if you just talk about a subject for 30 seconds or more, even if you never raised your voice, if I just talk about it, it's called a rant.
Author: Bill Burr - American ComedianYou , Your , Never , Voice
I'm not going to lie. I am a psycho. Luckily, I get most of it out on stage.
Author: Bill Burr - American ComedianLie , I Am , Stage , Psycho
They say you don't want to meet your heroes, but those two guys, you do want to meet them, because they do not disappoint. Walken has this amazing sense of humor, and Pacino is like just a sweetheart of a guy.
Author: Bill Burr - American ComedianHumor , You , Amazing , Meet
When I'm up there, I'm just thinking that I've got to make them laugh or they won't show up next time.
Author: Bill Burr - American ComedianTime , Thinking , Laugh , Show
You have to understand how bad I wanted to be a comedian, how much I loved doing it. I still can't believe I get to do this for a living and have people come up and want to see me.
Author: Bill Burr - American ComedianYou , Me , People , Believe
I have this weird sort of Gemini thing where I can really be empathetic and a loving person. But if you piss me off, I can be one of the meanest, most sadistic people.
Author: Bill Burr - American ComedianYou , Me , People , Weird
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